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What people say at work vs what they mean

1.  “Breakout session”  We will sit in a room and repeat very dull ideas.

2.  “In this brainstorm, there are no bad ideas”  This brainstorm will be nothing but bad ideas.

3.  “Could you put this in an email”  Which I will ignore.

4.  “By mutual agreement”  The boss thinks…

5.  “We’ve brought in a consultant”  Everyone is about to be fired.

6.  “We’re restructuring the company”  Everyone is fired.

7.  “It’s been great working with you guys”  So long suckers.

8.  “Moving on to greener pastures”  Fired.